From time to time I wonder if I am doubling up my life, like a new york city rapper that doubled up on a rap track if I am doubling up on my life. Like I had my original timeline and then I had to live it again just a little deeper. Like someone just handed me this coil of copper that’s in a plastic bag at men’s shelter like $25 worth of copper and I’m like I have seen this before, this coil of copper looks real familiar to me, and I just went through like 15 minutes of thought working on how Wikipedia was covering a story on fraud and that to the extent that wikipedia is covering fraud is to the extent that fraud will be dealt with to the extent that wikipedia, covers this topic, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fraud that’s what fraud is and it’s sort of nebulous what that is but based on how the world works there are people without honor and the cash is just out here in society and the goal is to get it and some people have no honor and they just do what they do to get the cash and like to me a show isn’t fraud, it’s someone dedicating their life to the stage, but like it’s when the music industry was taken over by thugs that it got interesting, when street gangsters started putting their shows on and stepped on stage, like if you remember before NWA the music industry was comprised of instruments and singers and dancers and that’s pretty much what the music industry was and then this concept known as NWA came out and that was inspired by the the song Rapper’s Delight and then rappers took this one black dude that appeared on American Band Stand and the african american nation saw a black man on Rapper’s Delight doing A Hip Hop A Hibba A Hip Hip Hop and you Don’t Stop and they just knew that African American was on television doing that and now we have Jay Z and it started with Rapper’s Delight and people mimicking what they see on television.
I had an interesting apartment in my last apartment, I communed with the future, spent so much time in my notebooks that I started having visions, and then there was the one night someone broke into my apartment stared at me and then walked out, and then there was the night that 4 invisible people I could see rested next to my bed and performed bowel surgery on me, and then walked out, and then there was the night clean of drugs the legit feeling of death took over me and I laid in bed preparing to die and then the demonic death feeling turned to a euphoric experience, and then there was the opening of my apartment when I spent like 4 hours cleverly rearranging everything in my apartment so that it would be an apartment I never lived in before, and then there was the night I had a life or death fight with my dick where it was nut or die, and then there was the vision of someone I know staring at me with a gun smoking in their hand with a camera in the back of my mouth looking out at the world sideways like I inspired the band name Vertical Horizon which is a man laying on the ground staring at the horizon from his perspective it looks vertical and then there are the thoughts that I have been killed before and nothing fucking not a fucking nothing thing went right after I was killed last time and there is the thought of me on stage with the person computer getting fucking cracked in the head with a drum stick which as I understand is the original reason I got out of music in the first place and went into writing which is because in this life the previous the one before that, I just have a distinct impression that I have no control over being born because I currently have no control over the fact that I am here but if there is reincarnation there is reincarnation for everyone and it’s just always fucking us on this planet and the level of not appreciating me is at a point where I beg to be born in a new timeline because I getting sick of looking at you people in this life and the next and the one before this and I get the impression it’s always me that gets fucked up because ya’ll just shitty people.
I doubt Industrial Lights and Magic could have put on a better show at my last apartment.
And I just got the copper that gave me deja vu.
And most of my dreams are in the third person like someone gave me music videos to do.